Thursday, September 25, 2008

updates

Well, this week we have been working on getting the rest of our paperwork together. We just had a few more things to add to our file. Looks like its all in order, including photos of our home, us and our families. Next our file heads to Ottawa.
Its still pretty exciting that we got our ministry approval!! I wasn't real worried that we wouldn't be approved - although our Adoption Practitioner did mention a few issues that the ministry might have been concerned about. Its just a really good feeling to be over this hurdle - and 6 weeks ahead of schedule. I have probably mentioned before that i always take the outside time lines when we are given a wide range. I would rather be pleasantly ahead of schedule than disappointed and waiting forever. Anyhoo - this next wait will be short and sweet (we hope).
Until then, the reno's continue. I put my back out last weekend, so my part is falling behind a bit. Mike is motoring right along. All the dry wall is now up and he has been working on the mudding/sanding.

Here is the hall - done except for some priming, painting and trim work. (so i guess not so much done - but really close and looking really good!!!)
I am going to love the new closet!!!

Its kind of hard to tell, but we put 2 closets in the baby's room. I figure if we have a girl you can never have enough closets and if you have a boy - he can share with Mommy :)

The last bits of drywall go up!! Yippeee. I think Mike will be more excited when the mudding and sanding is done. All those new closets have lots of crazy corners to fix up. He's the best!!! The new windows are also in!!! Very fancy to have windows that open and close!

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Approved!!!!

Well - today was the one of the most exciting days so far in our adoption. We got our ON Ministry approval!!!! oh goodness! I did a happy dance around the office - then had to take a walk through the building to find my mom (yep - we work at the same place). then I had to find my 'other mom' and spill all the good news.

I was so excited -that its hard to believe what it will be like when we actually get the referal. I think our caseworker was a bit surprised at how excited i was :)

What a relief!! And in only 6 weeks. Through this whole thing we are given time lines. I tend to want to believe the longer time line - which was 12 weeks -so now it feels like we are 6 weeks ahead of 'schedule'. I have no doubt that those 6 weeks will get used up waiting at for something else.

So - i did call Mike up in the middle of the day (well - night for him) to tell him the news... He forgives me now - i think.

So - i know i was just complaining about waiting just a few days ago . I guess that is part of this whole blog thing - you have to listen to me complain and then in a few days be over joyed with the way things turn out. I did tell you that the rantings of an 'expectant mother' may just be a little irrational. :)

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

do the math...

Ok - so it turns out i am not always that smart. I even work in accounting - in my heart of hearts I am not really a lover of numbers - sorry Len. But today - out of the blue - i realized that our baby could be born any time now.

People are always asking me if i think our baby is born yet - and my usual answer is "i hope not - i hope that our baby is as young as possible when we pick him/her up". Then i got to thinking - i know someone having a baby in the spring and i was thinking how cool it would be if they are close to the same age. Then i started doing the math - if our file gets to Ethiopia by December 08, then we get a referral by June 09 (i know - again with the wishful thinking) its very possible our baby could be born in October 08. We have requested a baby younger than 9 months at referral. Holy Cow - that means our baby could be born very soon. Now - you might think - duh - have you never thought this through??! Well - i guess i really haven't.

There is a certain amount of distance i think that you put between yourself and this adoption - in my case anyway. There have been many hurts along the way - so I try not to get too overly excited till something is the real deal. But today it just really hit me - our baby could be born any time now. Wow - it gave me goose bumps today at work and again just now.

All this to say - all i can think of is birth mom. What she must be going through, feeling and coming to terms with right now. This is an unbelievable woman we are talking about. She no doubt will be giving up her baby so that it can have a better life. Not sure i would have the strength to do what she is going to do. Please remember to keep her in your prayers.

Monday, September 15, 2008

adoptive mothers

I thought i might share this writing. Its been going around and I dont have anyone to credit to or I would. I wanted to say a few things before you read it: #1 Adoptive mothers are not perfect. #2 I dont want to 'glorify' adoption but do want you to know that there are some special aspects to parenting an adopted child. #3 this goes for dads too. #4 Since i have not yet been a mother I only hope to live up to it.

ADOPTIVE MOTHERS

Being an adoptive mother is not for every woman. She must possess not only the natural mother instinct but an understanding and appreciation of the situation that brought a child into her arms making her a mother. The adoptive family comes to be by choices made, choices made by the first parents and by the adoptive parents. This bond the adoptive mother has with her child grows over time, like the child did within his first mother’s womb.

Day by day, touch by touch, with each tear, kiss and memory made they become a family. Adoptive mothers have that special knack to let love grow.

Adoptive mothers know that she’s a mender of wounds, not just of the physical skinned knees with a band-aid and a kiss, but of the heart. She gives love, acceptance, and permission to ask and talk about the day he was born and of his first parents.

Adoptive mothers are embracers, not only of the child with many hugs and kisses, but of the child’s heritage and history. She embraces the facts of her child’s past with strength for herself and the child. She’s not only a memory maker planning family vacations, activities, and birthday parties, but also a memory keeper.

She’s a tier of shoelaces and of hearts. She weaves lives together into a tapestry of a new family, with many different brightly colored threads showcasing their individualities and family origins. Together they create one unit attached to each other.

Adoptive mothers are experts at finding lost objects, but understand and validate the profound, deep loss left by adoption. She allows the tears to fall and grief to be felt, allowing the mourning of the mom not there. She is secure in knowing that she’s not a replacement, but a finisher of a race for someone who, for whatever reason, could not run any longer.

This role is not for the weak of spirit, or the easily wounded. Loving a child not born to her but calling him her own, but this is what she does, it is her calling…..She is a mother

Thursday, September 11, 2008

waiting...

Waiting.

Seems like when you talk about adoption the key word is waiting. Our file has now been at the Ontario Ministry for 5 weeks. I heard some one just got their approval after 6 weeks - so maybe... Well, I won't get my hopes up too much. The sad part is that we are not even 'officially' waiting. Most people say the waiting begins when all the approvals are in and you are waiting for the referral. Then the REAL waiting begins. I don't know. We started this adoption business 6 months ago (although we started the research, etc long before that and really i have been waiting all my life to be a mom) and it looks like we have another 12 months to go. Not sure how much more of this waiting business i can handle. I guess its good that we are 1/3 of the way through - lets try to stay optimistic?? I never was all that patient - maybe i will learn something through all of this waiting. It's a good thing that the wait will eventually be worth it!

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

4 years have gone by fast!!!

Tomorrow we celebrate our 4th Anniversary!! Hard to believe!!! Seems just the other day i was gathering up 'my girls' into the bridal bus to shop for dresses. We had alot of fun on our wedding day - no drama!! It was a great celebration and wonderful day with our families and friends. I wouldn't change a thing.

The past 4 years have not always been easy. But we have grown together and supported each other through the good and the bad and the ugly! I look forward to more of the same!!! I love you Mike!! :)








Good bye summer





Well, i always feel like there isn't much to say- but then end up with a huge post :)

Our file is still at the ministry getting approved. In the mean time we have gotten the rest of our paper work together. The last thing we need to do is put some photos together. We are hoping that our file is done very soon. In my mind, I think our file will make it to Ethiopia by November, referral by April, travel by July 09?? Might be wishful thinking.

The most exciting thing that happened last week is the birth of our new nephew!! Andrew James John Manning (aka AJ) was born last Tuesday! He is a real cutie! We went to London to visit last week and I even got a chance to hold him for a few minutes. He is still in hospital but we are all hoping that he is able to come home soon. We are very excited to have this new member of our family. He is a great blessing to all of us! Its so cool that AJ and our baby may be pretty close in age. We really look forward to them growing up together with AJ's big brother Kyle leading the way!!

The renovations continue to move along well. The hall is now dry walled and has a first layer of mud. I even got to do some mudding - i figured i can ice a cake - i can mud a wall. So far so good. The bed room is looking good - we are waiting on a new window.

We also got to the beach on Sunday. It was a great family day - my parents and sister's fam were all there. I love the beach!! The weather was perfect and we had a great time. Its hard to say good bye to summer - i would like to think there could still be one more beach day...